Tuesday, March 25, 2008

A reply to a blog post I need to keep somewhere....


I assume you refer to my opinion, by the way, that men should not be compelled to pay child support. I can understand that response. After all, it's a responsibility right?

Well, here's the logic...poke holes in it if you like....

Men should have the right to legally "abort" their children, just like women do. In fact, men should have 100% parity with women in reproductive rights barring physical limitation. In effect, this means that if a woman can legally remove herself from parental responsibility, so can a man within the same time frame allowed. For all intents and purposes this means until "foundling" laws no longer apply.

This would mean there is functionally no time in which a man could not opt out of parenthood, until he opts "in", after which he cannot "opt out" anymore. Well, any more than a woman can. This removes the vast majority of child support obligors from the rolls I would imagine. Which leaves us mostly with men that were married, and thought they were going to raise a family - men that WANTED a family. Now, I know that most of these guys are going to pay CS, or buy things for their kids, or both. There's nothing keeping this from happening. But the assumption is that the person with custody of the kids pays for the kids things. If the woman has sole custody, she has sole responsibility. If the situation we ALL hope for arises, there will be 50/50 ACTUAL TIME with the kids, and in that situation again, no money should change hands.

The reasoning? She is NOT entitled to the same standard of living, nor are the children, ANY more than the father is. If it's all about the money, give the kids to the higher income earner. If they share time, they each pay their own expenses.

At worst, there could be a "childcare expense pool" type of escrow account set up to cover shared expenses like braces, clothing, etc, or to compensate for agreed upon imbalances in responsibilities. Other than those, both parents have to provide the same amenities and should be responsible for their own.

So....

If we don't compel men into fatherhood, and we give them equal time with their kids by default, unless they CHOOSE otherwise (fit parent blah blah blah disclaimer) as well as equal responsibilities for upkeep of said children, where exactly is the need for child support?

In fact, I'll even go one further, because if that comes to pass it will mean anyone who is paying CS either doesn't want to be around his kids, or is unfit to see his kids....and the resulting shame will motivate some to rectify that situation. Hardly a negative consequence if you ask me...

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