Monday, December 14, 2009

The new Gender Paradigm?

Recently in a debate, the argument was put forward that MRA's want to put women "barefoot and pregnant, back in the kitchen" or some such nonsense. At which point the woman then pointed out a new double-bind that is beginning to take form...only this time, it is women who are going to "enjoy" it.

Namely, MRA's don't generally want a "traditional" wife, nor do we want a "co-husband" to make each day extra challenging! This person asked, essentially, "if you don't want this, and you don't want that, what the hell are women supposed to be?" Her inference was that MRAs are being unreasonable and therefore our concerns had no validity.

This argument is showing up more and more, as women begin to come to terms with the fact that the party's over...the sleeping giant has awakened...and he's out of Folgers.

Women's behaviour is coming under increasing scrutiny, and time and again it is found wanting...although this is itself often minimized at the same time as it's talked about. Men's issues are becoming more mainstream and people are beginning to ask why the double standards, and beginning to say things like "yeah yeah, rape is, are you going to answer my question?"

And they demand to know the new role they're "expected" to fill? The traditional, or the Feminist?

Here's the irony...why the hell should we MRAs care? I mean at all? It's YOUR role, you choose it. If you choose wrong, you're not going to do well. Have fun, let me know how it all works out for you.


Did these people forget about the last 40 years, when men repeatedly asked what they were expected to be? Notice the expectations and actions of women didn't mesh too well? Asking someone else who you should be as a person is a really Bad Idea(tm), I think men's experience with Feminism illustrates that quite nicely.

More to the point, it's not our responsibility as MRAs to decide these things. It's YOUR turn to flounder around figuring out how to avoid criticism, and fulfil the expectations placed on you. YOU figure it out.

It's not our job.


  1. I hate stuff like that.

    Why can't people understand that the mens movement is not a womens movement i mean..This should be obvious with the name, But clearly some people are too fucking stupid to get it.

    Our movement hasn't been about women, Isn't about women, And won't be about women. Most people are baffled by this and i think it's obvious why.

  2. It isn't just the MRAs who are apathetic to the concerns of what women desire. In larger and ever-growing numbers, men are becoming the Refuseniks of social paradigm. We have not just been marginalized out of any concern women have for a better world, we have been marginalized out of society in general, except as comic relief due to our innate buffoonery; or so would Madison Avenue, the Screen Actor's Guild, and the gyno-centric press would have us all believe.

    The very real problem for them is, when you fob sub-standard goods and services onto a group of people for long enough, you lose customers by the droves. Even if you regard yourself as the only resource available and thus are above responding to complaints, sooner or later you will lose people who refuse to deal with you in any way.

    It used to be honorable to be a man. It is far more honorable to be a Refusenik.

  3. I think the MGTOW aspect of the MRM is going to grow exponentially, and I think most of those that go their own way will do so while unaware of the MRM at all.

    It's simply a natural response to the situation.

    That's why I find it funny that Feminists and women argue with me on this point. It's not like they can say no man would ever do it...since there's lots of men who do it. The contention that these men are "rejects" anyway is being exposed as bullshit as well.

    Sure, the argument has turned into one that defends Feminism as not being the cause rather than denying the existence of said problem, but the denial is the same.

    Mainly, they want to maintain the status quo, want men to stop complaining/caring and stick their head back in the sand, and above all stop blaming Feminism.

    I suppose the many years of lack of realism in their outlook and rhetoric have ill-prepared them for facing facts.

    Like it or not, men are increasingly disgusted with women's behaviour. Like it or not men are fed up with special priveleges for everyone but them, and glaring legal inequality.

    Like it or not, change is coming. The cat is out of the bag. Which brings me to my final point:

    Like it or not, Feminism, and Feminists, ARE responsible either directly or indirectly, for all of these problems. There is ample evidence of it, all one needs do is look.

    Men are waking up. They're NOT pleased. And they KNOW who's responsible.

    No amount of denial can avoid that fact.

  4. Factory,

    This is good stuff! I just put a link to you on my list, BTW.

    I don't consider myself MRA though; a man only has to worry about his rights IF he's dumb enough to get married. Rather, I consider myself more a MGHOW. As such, I couldn't give a hoot what women do, what they are, etc. as long as they LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE! I'm with you. Let women worry about what's expected of them, etc. That's their problem now...


  5. Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

  6. "yeah yeah, rape is, are you going to answer my question?"

    That is very good! Excellent!

    I will definitely consider stealing it! ;)

  7. Nice fill someone in on and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Say thank you you for your information.

  8. Recently I've stopped all my paper and print media subscriptions due to not being able to find anything positive about the male gender published in them. If there was anything positive in them about men, it was only in the sports section or as some hidden sideline, tucked away under a women panties first ad style format. Even my MENS HEALTH MAGAZINE ( it claims itself to be the worlds largest mens magazine ) has a majority female editoral and support staff ( of 11 depts., 9 are female majority ). How's a man supposed to get a males perpective on things concerning men through a female centric editorial-filtering staff of women? This is of major concern to me. I don't trust any news or info. concerning men coming from women nowadays, particularly if I open a newspapers or magazines cover and its companies editorial page is mostly women running the publication or magazine ! I have begun to question whether I'm getting any pro-male / anti-female info that may prove to be vital to my health or well being as a male when pitted against feminist society at large ? Could they be counted on to deliver me any info that is pertinent to me as a man, that might not be so good to females, let's say, like divorse advice, domestic violence / pro male / protection advice or female avoidance tactics, pro-male paternity advice and pro-male law developments, etc. ? I would rather donate this money to MRA /MRM SITES because I know as a man,when comparing info found on MRM sites and the same info is not even found in their publications, an honest, open public debate is not taking place,and hence a failure of confidence in them as info providers ensues. For a presumptive "Hidden Agenda of Reasons, or feministic chilvary and or misandry by them, is of no use or concern of mine. For me, the MRM / MRA SITES ARE BECOMING MY SOURCE OF INFO and NEWS.These sites are true houses of refuse for me as a man and men issues are concerned in general...these MRA sites are not merely props for employing chivarist / feminist opinions, guised as mens interests, but a vital link for me to a brotherhood sorely missing in the mass media of today. So,... I've decided to sever all financial ties with these publications and donate this money instead to the online M.R.A.s and to our causes....its money , well invested...not money , just merely spent.

  9. I think that's becoming a reality for more and more men, anonymous...

    Seriously, I think the demographic shift from mainstream media to online content has been explained largely as a result of the male audience shifting online (to porn, the inference is, of course..). I think more and more men are getting not only fed up with the misandry in the mainstream media, but they're becoming increasingly aware of, and resentful of, PURPOSEFUL skewing of information and withholding of other adhere to an ideology that is about equality in slogan only..

    More and more men are tuning out. Let's hope they follow your example.

    Markymark: Thanks :)

    Fidelbogen: Steal whatever you like... It's yours for the takin'.

  10. I think what these semi-apologists need to understand is this:

    This is war.

    Wars are not fought nicely.

    When a war is fought nicely, you lose.

    Men did not start this war.

    There can be no rapprochement. There can be only victory.